


Day 14: When All I Had Was Your Voice

by gettingaphdinlarry



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Emotional Sex, Established Relationship, M/M, Memories, Phone Sex, Secrets, You and me got a whole lot of history
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-14
Updated: 2016-10-14
Packaged: 2018-08-15 08:48:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8049892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gettingaphdinlarry/pseuds/gettingaphdinlarry
Summary: “I missed you so much,” Louis whispered. “Mum kept asking why I was so happy.”“I know, mine too. We had to sneak those phone calls. Rub yourself over your trousers, not too much.”“Done.” Louis lightly stroked his fingertips over the wool fabric. “Remember how quiet I had to be?”“’Cause of your sisters,” Harry said. “My cock’s hard, Lou.”“Don’t touch yet, wait until I do. Remember how shy we were?”“We? I kept trying—”“I know, I know. You kept trying and I was the shy one,” Louis said.::When Louis has to work late one night, he and Harry connect over shared memories.





	Day 14: When All I Had Was Your Voice

**Author's Note:**

> Although this is part of a collection, this is a stand-alone fic. Louis is an overworked lawyer, Harry is a stay-at-home writer who takes care of their two kids, and they're trying to have sex for thirty days in a row. This is day fourteen, and it's a Friday night.

“What’s wrong?” Louis closed his office door, locking it behind him out of habit, and paced in front of his desk. “Is it the kids, is someone hurt?”

“It’s past eleven, aren’t you coming home?”

Louis stopped in his tracks. “ _That’s_ the emergency?”

“I’ve been texting and ringing all evening.”

“I’ve been in meetings all day, I told you I might be working late. Liz is waiting for me. She saw your email pop up on my comput—”

“It’s past eleven, Lou!” Harry’s voice broke with anger. Louis opened his mouth but was stopped by the sigh he heard through the phone. “Are you going to be home soon?”

Louis took a deep breath and rubbed the back of his neck. He leaned against the wall. “Fuck, Haz, I’m… I don’t know when I’ll be done.”

Harry cleared his throat. “It won’t be before midnight?”

“Can’t we have sex after I get home?” Louis tipped his head back against the wall and closed his eyes. “It’s important, big client, giant wrench, ugh. I just want to finish so we have the weekend together.”

“I’m tired, Lou.”

Louis rubbed his jaw and shifted his mobile to the other ear. “Me, too, babe. Want to take a nap and I’ll wake you up? I won’t forget, can have a quick—”

“Are you in your office?”

“Mm?”

Harry’s voice dropped. “Where are you?”

Louis opened his eyes and looked around. “In my office,” he said slowly.

“Good. Grab yourself.”

Louis laughed. “What?”

“You heard me,” Harry said. “Grab yourself.”

“Grab myself? At work?”

Harry sighed. “Can you get yourself home by midnight?”

Louis looked at his watch. “No.”

Harry’s voice was firm. “Then grab yourself.”

Louis shifted uncomfortably, Harry’s voice affecting him no matter where his hands were. “Can’t I just talk you into getting off—”

“You’ve done this in your old bedroom, you can do this now.”

“You did not just pull that out.”

“Am I lying?”

Louis bit his lip. “No.” He cleared his throat and spoke louder. “Hold on, law firm etiquette dictates phone calls have some sort of agenda. Billable hours and all that. How long do you think we’ll need?”

“Agenda: phone sex. Time needed: I dunno, how fast can you—”

“Twenty minutes. I can hear you smiling, Haz.”

Harry chuckled. “You know me.”

Louis felt his shoulders soften. “I do. Hold on, babe, let me send a quick email.” Louis put his mobile face-down on the desk and sent his colleague a message. Thank God it was late and the building was mostly empty. “OK, I’ve got twenty minutes or so.”

“I’m in bed, on my back, pants and nothing else.”

Louis leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes. He inhaled deeply, held his breath for a moment, and sighed. “Well, that’s a nice image. I’m at my desk. Like usual.”

“Wish you were home, hon.”

“Hair up or down?”

“Down, damp from the shower.”

"A nighttime shower?" Louis groaned. He could see Harry splayed out on the bed, his hair fanned out around him in loose knots. He ground his palms against his thighs. “Sorry I’m not there.”

“Been a while since we did this.” Harry’s voice was quiet, husky, and Louis had to strain to hear him. “Kind of feels weird.”

“We haven’t done this in forever.” Louis licked his lips. “First time was in uni, right? Touch your chest, rub your hands over your nipples.”

“OK,” Harry said. Louis heard him shift. “Mm, yeah. That winter break. Are you touching yourself?”

“No, waiting for you to tell me to.”

“Can if you want to.”

“I missed you so much,” Louis whispered, ignoring Harry's offer. They’d only been dating a few months then. Not long enough to skip family holidays, not long enough to bring the other home. Harry had just started growing out his hair, and every day it was different. A snapback, a scarf, a wild mess. Those were fine. It was the puffed-up quasi-quiff that made him look like a Yorkshire pudding fresh out of the oven that Louis liked the least. Never told him, was grateful when his hair got too long for that. Louis grinned at the memory and bit his cheek to stop himself from mentioning it now. “Mum kept asking why I was so happy.”

“I know, mine too. We had to sneak those phone calls. Rub yourself over your trousers, not too much.”

“Done.” Louis lightly stroked his fingertips over the wool fabric. “Remember how quiet I had to be?”

“’Cause of your sisters,” Harry said. “My cock’s hard, Lou.”

“Don’t touch yet, wait until I do. Remember how shy we were?”

“We? I kept trying—”

“I know, I know. You kept trying and I was the shy one,” Louis whispered. He sighed and listened to Harry, the small noises coming from his throat. Louis could swear he could hear him writhing on the bed. That winter, for days, Harry had tried to start…flirting with Louis on the phone. Louis had always changed the conversation, steered it away. Finally, Harry had tricked him. He’d interrupted some story about shopping with the twins with a command that still made Louis laugh—

“Grab your winky.”

“Oh God, you did not,” Louis groaned, his voice reverberating off his office walls. “No, you—”

“Grab your winky,” Harry said, giggling. “And don’t roll your eyes, I can see you rolling your eyes.”

“I am.” Louis pushed a laugh back down his throat and said what he’d said that winter night. “‘My winky?’”

Harry put on his most serious voice and repeated what he’d said all those years ago, the strain in his voice evident. “‘Your cock, your dick, wild snake, I don’t fucking know.’”

Louis laughed loudly and unfastened his trousers. He slipped his hand under his pants, gripped his dick and groaned. “I am grabbing my wild fucking snake, I’ll have you know.”

“Good, me too,” Harry said. “I still can’t believe that line worked. How hard can I touch?”

“Softly, gently, like I’m teasing you.”

“Dammit.”

“Too soft?” Louis bit the inside of his cheek and glanced at the door to check it was locked. He pushed his clothes down so he could move better. “Yeah, that line worked. It was so…you.”

“I missed you so much, I didn’t realize, before. How much I would, I mean.” Harry’s voice rolled over Louis like a soft down blanket. He wanted to wrap himself up in his husband’s voice and fall asleep listening to him talk.

“Mmm,” Louis hummed. “If I were there, I’d kiss your throat, that spot right by your ear, and tell you a secret about all those phone calls.”

“A secret?”

“Yeah, a secret. Pump your cock a bit.”

Harry whined and sighed. “What kind of secret?”

“I’ll tell you later, promise. Tell me a story. Something you did on the holidays, I don’t know, something with your mates.” Louis licked his thumb and brushed it over the top of his dick. “Tell me while I suck a bruise on your neck.”

Louis heard Harry thrash and he rubbed his thumb over the head of his cock and slid lower in his seat, giving himself room to work. Louis’ eyes darted to the clock and then his email. Nothing yet.

“Um, we played footie, and all I could think was that I wanted you there.”

“Mmm, keep going,” Louis whispered. “So I can keep kissing you, the birds. And keep stroking your cock, because I’d be doing that, too.”

“I kept checking my phone to see if you’d sent any messages,” Harry said, his voice heavy and low. “Fuck, I wish you were here.”

“Wish I was there, too.” Louis tightened his forearm and worked himself faster. He swallowed hard and controlled his breathing, forcing himself to slow it down. “I did that, too, checked my phone I mean. Would be kissing your ribs, Harry, slowly, leaving little licks all over them.”

Air whooshed over the phone line and Louis rolled his head back against the chair. Little licks? He sounded so stupid.

“Your birthday, I spent the morning wandering a local bookshop, thinking of all the books I wanted to buy you, had a collection of a half dozen of them. Put them all back, didn’t buy a one.”

Louis furrowed his brow. “Why not?”

“I don’t know, seemed too…soon?”

“I would’ve loved them, you know,” Louis said.

“My cock is fucking hard. You’d better finish all of your work tonight, stay until it’s done—”

“Please, work isn’t on the agenda. Keep talking.”

“Talking about some uni break a decade ago wasn’t on the agenda, Lou.”

“Changed my mind, added it. Wanna hear your voice. OK? Just…just don’t stop touching yourself, pretend it’s my hand.”

“Fair enough,” Harry murmured in agreement. Louis closed his eyes, letting himself sink into the sound of it. “Remember how I stopped texting while you were with your friends that night, your birthday, I mean?”

“Yeah.”

“Said it was ’cause you were with your mates. Really, I was at a pub with mine and they took away my mobile because I kept looking at it.”

Louis laughed. “Seriously?”

“Yeah, wouldn’t give me my fucking phone.” Harry let out a low groan. “Talk to—”

“Would run my tongue along the crease of your thigh, rub my cheek against your dick,” Louis said, his voice reedy and airy, his hand still moving. “Keep talking, Harry.”

“Fuck.” Louis heard Harry move. “Pulled my pants off. Naked now. Remember the night after Christmas? When we talked for a long time?”

Louis nodded and then remembered Harry couldn’t see him. “You were going to the cinema or something, but your friend got sick.”

Harry started laughing, a heavy sound with its edges roughed up by the night. “I lied about that. My mate wasn’t sick.”

Breath caught in his throat, Louis didn’t speak for a moment. “He wasn’t?” Louis started twisting his hand around his cock, his legs stretching straight out in front of him, toes pointed in his shoes. Fuck, Harry really needed to keep talking.

“Yeah, he was fine, but we didn’t really talk much on your birthday, or Christmas and…” Harry inhaled and sighed. “I missed you, Lou.” Louis groaned in agreement. “Told him I wasn’t feeling well, then lied to you because, well. I didn’t want you to think I was silly, we hadn’t been dating long.”

There was a long silence and Louis tugged at his dick, trying to find a rhythm. “Harry, I—”

“I actually looked up train times, too. Was thinking of showing up at your door. ‘Surprise!’ But I thought that would be too much.” Harry’s voice filled the hollow of Louis’ chest, clung to his ribs like fog. “But I really did look at the times, thought I could just visit for a day, you could show me Donny Dome… You’d once said something about it, about taking me…”

That did it.

Louis thrust his hand out, holding the phone away from him, Harry’s voice distant. He jammed his heels against the ground, the wheels of his chair pushing him back at the same time his abdomen clenched, making his chest curl forward hard. Louis opened his mouth wide, taking in deep, quiet breaths, and slid his palm over the head of his dick as come spilled down his cock and settled on his thighs. He squeezed his eyes shut and turned his head to the side, breath ragged. Harry couldn’t know. Not yet. Keep talking, Harry, keep talking, he willed while he waited for his heart to stop crashing against his chest.

Slowly, his bicep shaking, Louis brought the phone back to his ear. He opened his eyes, the room swimming in front of him while he rubbed his still-wet palm over his dick. Where the hell were the extra serviettes from takeaway? “—thought I could meet your sisters, too, maybe, but Gemma told me not to rush things, and I’m glad I didn’t because later you did take me to Donny Dome and it was so much fun, even if I had no idea what I was doing, right?”

Harry laughed and Louis did too, as he cradled the phone against his shoulder. He steadied his voice. “Mm. It was.”

“You OK? You sound really close—”

“I’m fine, just…turned on.” Louis shook his head and bit the meaty flesh near the base of his thumb hard. Fuck. He cleared his throat. “What was your favourite part of Donny Dome?” While Harry answered, Louis swivelled in his chair and pulled open his desk drawer, cringing when it squeaked. He found the serviettes and wiped himself clean, wincing at the coarse paper. He really should bring a damn cloth napkin to work one of these days.

“What about you?”

Louis’ head snapped up. “Huh?”

“What was your favourite part?”

“Oh, hmm. Let me think.” Louis dropped the serviettes in the bin and adjusted his clothes, zipping up his trousers. He glanced at the clock and turned his chair around, away from the door. Louis rolled his lip between his fingers and grinned. He spoke in a clear, even tone. “My favourite part was blowing you in my bedroom after you made fun of my football trophies, when my family was all still awake and we could hear them playing board games in the other room.”

Harry groaned and Louis smirked and pumped a fist in the air. Exactly what he wanted.

He continued in the same tone, as if reading a newspaper clipping out loud. “You had to bite your fist to keep from making noise when you came, shooting your load—”

“Oh God, Lou.”

“—down my throat.” Louis dropped his voice so it was sinuous. “Your legs were shaking, remember? I had to steady you, hold you up.” Louis listened to Harry, his shallow breathing. “You’re still touching yourself, right? Do you need to put me on speaker? To be able to move?”

“Mm?”

“Just want you to be comfortable.”

“No, I’m good. You can hear me, right?”

“Absolutely.” Louis cleared his throat and Harry sighed, the sound echoing through the line. “Perfect. You were so perfect, your cock on my tongue. If I were there, I’d wrap my hand around your dick and work you fast while sucking on just the tip of you, my hand keeping you from going all the way down—”

“Oh, God. Lou—”

“—just like in my bedroom that day. Remember how hot it was, sweat was running down your skin—” Louis drew in a sharp breath and listened to Harry pulling at himself. Harry’s breathing turned into hard exhalations and Louis’ eyes drifted shut. He could see the furrow in Harry’s brow, the way his lips parted, feel his hands in his hair. “Your skin tasted so clean.” Louis opened his eyes, his lids heavy. He spoke slowly, punctuating each phrase with a sigh. “And smelled sweet, and your legs were shaking. So I had to take my hand off your cock, remember?”

“I…I’m…”

Louis smiled. “I can hear you, just listen.” Harry groaned and something that sounded like _OK_ followed. “Your legs shook. So I held you up and you kept half-giggling because we were both so nervous. And Harry.” He gasped and Louis drove forward, his voice raspy. “Your cock was too much and I loved, loved, loved that I knew—just knew—I was going to fuck you later on that tiny little bed—”

“Lou, Lou, ahhh,” Harry’s cry travelled through the phone line, and Louis leaned his head against his chair, closed his eyes and licked his lips. He grinned at the memory of his childhood bed moving across the floor in an uneven rhythm that night.

Louis waited for Harry to catch his breath. When he finally started up a loose, shaky laugh, Louis said, “And I did fuck you on that tiny little bed—”

“Yeah and you nearly drew blood on my shoulder, trying to keep quiet yourself,” Harry said, his voice sleepy. He shuffled the phone and the bed creaked. Louis knew he must’ve rolled over, must be propped up on his elbows, his back cooling, skin prickling in the air. “Do I need to tell you that story to get you off?”

Louis’ lips twisted to the side and he raked a hand through his hair. “Ah, about that.”

“I can do it quickly,” Harry said. “You’ve gotta be pretty fucking hard, right?”

“I came. Earlier.”

“What? When?”

Louis’ shoulders jerked to his ears. “Don’t be mad. I’m sorry.”

“I’m not—I’m just confused. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Remember I said I had a secret to tell you? About those calls?”

“Yeah.” Harry sounded wide awake and suspicious, any trace of sleepiness stripped away.

“I… Just hear me out, OK?” Louis turned the chair and propped his feet up on his desk. He leaned back in his chair and fiddled with a pen, twirling it around his fingers a few times before dropping it.

“Mm.”

“It wasn’t my sisters that kept me from having phone sex with you. I mean, OK, a little bit. But you know how our phone calls kept happening a little earlier and lasting a little longer, so we were staying up until two or three—”

“Or four,” Harry added with a chuckle.

“Yeah, and there was that one time we both fell asleep on the phone.” Louis smiled and rubbed his fingers over the side of his trousers, feeling the ridge of the seam. “I—that was when I really knew I loved you.”

“Hmm?”

“I—your voice. I missed you. Not your body—I mean, yeah, I missed that, but I missed _you_. I wanted to spend my days with you and my time with you. And I was…” Louis picked at a loose thread; Harry would help him clip it later. He took a deep breath and held it for a second before finally speaking in a rush. “I was afraid that if we had phone sex, we’d both get off and hang up. And I didn’t want that. I wanted all that time with you. Until two, or three, or four in the morning.”

“That…” Harry’s voice dropped. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

Louis shrugged and glanced at his email. Nothing. Good. “I don’t know. And there’s more.”

“More?”

“God, this is embarrassing—”

“As embarrassing as calling your man’s dick a wild snake?”

“Nothing tops that!” Louis laughed. “Wait, calling it ‘winky’ does, actually.”

“It still worked!” Harry said with a giggle.

“It did,” Louis said. “OK, but those calls? That’s when I fell in love with your voice. I liked your voice fine, don’t get me wrong.” An image of Harry’s Yorkshire pudding hair flashed in Louis’ mind again and he shook his head. His secret hatred for that hairstyle would never come out. At least not tonight. “But before, your voice had always come with you. During those calls, your voice was the only thing I had. You know?”

There was a long pause before Harry answered. “So when you told me to tell you a story…”

“Yeah.” Louis felt heat on his cheeks and chest. “That was when I came. When you were telling your holiday secrets, train tables, all that.”

“You’re telling me my voice made you come?”

“I did have my hand on my dick!”

“But really, my voice made you come.”

Louis nodded. “That, and thinking back to when _all I had_ was your voice.”

“That is so…”

“Cheesy?”

“Lovely.”

Warmth spread through Louis’ body and he rested his hands on his torso, fingers threaded together. He nodded his head in the empty room. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” Harry spoke quietly, stretching out his words. “Hey, I really don’t want to go, but looking at the clock, and the agenda, and knowing your billable hours rate, I think I have to.”

Louis sighed. “I know. Sleep tight, I’ll be quiet when I come in, OK?”

“You always are. Bye, Lou.”

“Bye,” Louis said, and then, “Wait!”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for holding me to it—the challenge, I mean.”

“Thanks for grabbing your wild snake.”

Louis laughed. “Bye, babe.”

“Hey… Thanks for telling me your secrets.” Harry’s voice was damp linen. “Bye.”

“By—” Louis started, but the line was dead.

Louis tapped his phone against his thigh, a grin spreading across his face.

Damp linen.

Harry would wake up with damp hair the next morning. It never dried when he showered at night, and he always seemed to think it would. Louis would say the moisture was probably bad for the down pillows and tell Harry to blow dry it out. Harry would stumble out of bed, running his fingers through his loose curls, his movements stiff. He’d mutter that showering at night was a mistake, and demand to know how come Louis never reminded him of that.

Harry was right, of course.

But if Louis could get Harry out of bed first, he would roll over onto his pillow. He would press his cheek into the cool spot left by Harry’s wet hair, inhale the scent of his shampoo and conditioner. He would bask in the lingering warmth sheltered between the sheets. A shadow of Harry, wholly belonging to Louis.

Harry shouldn’t shower at night; Louis loved it when he did.

That was another secret that could wait to be shared.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to my Britpicker [@hevab](http://hevab.tumblr.com/). Your advice is always appreciated.
> 
> Thank you to my beta, [@myownsparknow](http://myownsparknow.tumblr.com), who helped me figure out the exact right words, and who gets why it matters so much. (Thank you, also, for making the manips for the rebloggable post!)
> 
> And thank you to my friend [@edlovespussy](http://edlovespussy.tumblr.com/) for unintentionally giving me the wild snake line. I'm so happy to call you a friend. Thank you to [@theseawalker](http://theseawalker.tumblr.com) for that one phrase. I'm so glad you messaged me.
> 
> Suggested songs for this fic are Hozier's “[Someone New](https://open.spotify.com/track/0efT4YKQLQx2YHbp6vgRX8),” James Bay's “[Incomplete](https://open.spotify.com/track/78O8CIzX5ZMuJh39fQOR3i)” and Troye Sivan's “[Talk Me Down](https://open.spotify.com/track/0nRuVPZx2iA3KWR4xSzryl).”
> 
> Hey, look! A [rebloggable photo post](http://gettingaphdinlarry.tumblr.com/post/152607376641/day-14-when-all-i-had-was-your-voice-3574-words)!


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